When life hands you lemons... just roll your eyes and pour a drink. These hilariously honest cocktail napkins feature a fabulously fed-up housewife and the dry-as-a-martini truth:
“My life coach just informed me I didn’t make the team.”

Perfect for those days when you're over it before noon and need a cocktail by five, these napkins are wrapped in a retro orange pattern and seasoned with sarcasm.

Perfect For:

• Midweek meltdowns and weekend wine downs

• Gifting your fellow life dropouts

• Adding humor to any gathering, planned or otherwise

Because not everyone’s cut out for the team—and that’s what happy hour is for. 🍸🙃🏆

Details

• 20 napkins per package
• 3 ply
• Printed with non-toxic, water soluble dyes
• Dimensions: 5" x 5"
• Origin: Germany

Shipping & Returns

• Processing Time: Orders ship within 1 to 3 business days (excluding weekends and holidays). Delays due to high order volume or carrier issues will be communicated via email. A shipping confirmation email with tracking details is sent once the order ships.
• Domestic Shipping:
• Shipping rates are calculated at checkout or a $6.99 flat rate applies for most U.S. orders, excluding Alaska, Hawaii, Puerto Rico, U.S. territories, and APO/FPO addresses.
• Exclusions: Heavy, oversized, hazardous materials, or special handling items may have different rates.
• In-Store Pickup: Free local pickup is available at 27 Beach Street, Ogunquit, Maine, ready within 1 to 3 business days. An email notification will be sent when the order is ready.
• International Shipping:
• Ships to Canada and the United Kingdom.
• Shipping rates calculated at checkout.
• Import duties and taxes (including VAT) are the customer’s responsibility.
• Order Tracking: A tracking number is provided via email. Tracking updates may take 48 hours. If an order isn’t received within 7 days of shipping confirmation, customers should contact us at spoilme@spoiledrottenogt.com.
• PO Box Shipping: Only available through USPS (UPS & FedEx do not deliver to PO boxes).
• Returns & Refunds:
• Returns accepted within 30 days of delivery for unused items in original condition. Refunds exclude return shipping costs.
• Damaged items: Customers should email support with their order number and a photo of the item’s condition for resolution.

For further assistance, contact spoilme@spoiledrottenogt.com or (207) 641-8477.